Sweet Moments in Chaos

The past two weeks have been a roller coaster of emotions and a feeling of chaotic activity and to be honest, feels like it's been more like a month. My mother-in-law was in the hospital for a week, then released and we took her to an assisted living facility last Wednesday. On Saturday, we moved my father-in-law in with some of their furniture. On Sunday, my mother-in-law ended back in the hospital with a urinary tract infection that had gone unnoticed and untreated and she is now is septic.

We aren't really sure if she is going to make it. Yesterday, she was more alert and drinking some water, but she's in pain and if they adjust her in the bed she is crying and in agony. She hasn't eaten in a few days and can't swallow pills without choking so has all the medication going through an IV.

We've been making the hour-long trek to see her, deal with my father-in-law and things in their house. It's a lot to manage and I especially feel for Dan's sister who has borne the brunt of this.

But in the middle of this stress and flurry of activity, texting, phone calls and medical situation, there have been many sweet moments.

💓 Chatting over lunch in the hospital cafeteria.

💓 Doing jigsaw puzzles in the waiting area with the sunshine beating on us through the windows. That felt wonderful as sunshine is a rare sight lately.

💓 My brother-in-law bringing his guitar and playing for his mom.

💓 Little thoughtful gestures like the lotion my sister-in-law brought to rub on Mom.

💓 Rubbing my mother-in-law's hand yesterday and she looked at me and said, "Thank you. That feels so good."

💓 Nurses who have been communicative with all of us and helpful.

💓 My mother-in-law looking and me and her granddaughter and saying, "You are both so beautiful."

💓 Seeing her more alert and coherent yesterday and watching nature scenery on the television. She'd drift into sleep and all of the sudden wake up and say, "Look at that bird!" "How beautiful!" and then fall asleep again.

💓 The different grandchildren have almost all gotten a chance to visit or call and told her they loved her. She lit up yesterday as her granddaughter from North Carolina walked into the room. She had driven 12 hours to get to see her.

💓 Dan and his brother decompressing while coloring on this wall designed just for that purpose.

💓 Yesterday, I spent the morning cleaning my in-laws house.  They have a mouse problem and my brother-in-law thoughtfully went over and disposed of mice that were caught in traps before I arrived so I wouldn't have to do it.

💓 My sister-in-law and brother-in-law went over to the house the night before and started cleaning and organizing some things to help me out.

💓 Seeing pictures of beautiful memories displayed throughout their house. Their children and grandchildren were important to them and it shows.

💓 My boys have done a wonderful job, helping Dan manage his father during the past couple of weeks. They've been patient with him even when he causes frustration.

💓 Watching my father-in-law and mother-in-law, crying and telling each other how much they love one another.

💓 My brother-in-law who stepped in with being the one to communicate information for a few days when my sister-in-law was overwhelmed and needed a break. He's been wonderful dealing with so much.

💓 Friends who send messages, telling me they are praying.

💓 Another friend who sent and unexpected monetary gift which is helping tremendously with the trips, parking and hospital meals.

💓 Technology which allows the grandchildren who can't be there to be able to FaceTime with her.

We are all grieving and dealing with this in different ways, but I'm thankful we are all okay with that and aren't forcing our way of dealing with emotions on everyone else. Our family is far from perfect, but it's been so wonderful to see everyone working together when it's needed. 

Those sweet moments in the middle of chaos and grief are like little mini-oasis in a desert.