Hearts in Service Blog

Mountain Laurel in full bloom Our walk yesterday started out beautiful. It ended like this. Our front windshield on the drive home yesterday - Yikes!   On one of my walks, a little boy who was with his mom saw my camera and said, "That's a cool camera! Can I take a picture with it?" How could I resist that adorable face! It's been a strange kind of week and one in which I mostly have spent it trying to stay hydrated. We are in the middle of a heat wave and the past couple of days the humidity has been added to the mix.  I think it's felt so strange because my normal routine has been off. I've had a couple of internal 3 a.m. wake-up calls and then struggled to get back to sleep. So I've had some days of just feeling lethargic between the lack of sleep and the heat.  I was the host for an online zoom event for women around the world and that was a little nerve-wracking as I prayed my connection would work. Later that day, I led a local Bible study as well.  ...

Back in July, my daughter's maid-of-honor and I hosted the bridal shower for her. We had a toast for her and different people offered words of advice for her marriage. I shared the following and thought I'd share it here today. We are down to 5 days before the wedding - yikes! Skating Through Life Together Some say marriage is a 50/50 arrangement where both parties give 50% to the marriage. Then I’ve heard others say it’s a 100% arrangement, where you both bring 100% to the marriage. However, I think marriage is more like figure-skating. It has always been one of my favorite sports at the Olympics. I love the gracefulness and beauty of the skaters and could watch it for hours. When a marriage is good, it is like those skaters gliding over the ice. I came up with 5 reasons that marriage is like figure-skating. 1. The couples who skate at this level have chosen their partners wisely. They didn’t just pick the first person that came along. Figure skaters often take the advice of t...

As a wide-eyed, naïve 26-year-old I had no idea of what I was in for when I said the words, "I do!" Our journey has taken us from being seminary students to working in the inner city to rural church planting and now back to a small city. It has spanned thirty-three years of diapers, health crises, disabilities, extended family issues, blessings and conflict. We have worked our way through personality quirks and flaws, as well as giftings and growth. Our faces show age lines as well as stress lines. Ministry is not always easy and at times, our marriage has felt the stress of what was happening in our ministry-life. Being in full-time ministry is not for the faint of heart and if you let it, it can wreak havoc on your family life.  We've been through death and loss, life and love. This past year has been a year of stormy seas as we dealt with the loss of my grandmother, my mom, a move and new job, Covid, my own depression, and changes in the way we handle having adult chil...

We walk silent through the woods, each lost in our own thoughts. Each feeling a heavy burden in different ways. Mine usually has to do with my children and family. He carries the weight of pastoring a church on his shoulders. It's been an especially tough few days as a dear woman in our church is entering her last days and we are both sad about that. Dan is generally easy going and laid back. He's not a Type-A personality nor strong in the area of programming or administration. But what he is strong in is being relational. He is wonderful with people and can chat with them all day long, talking about whatever they are comfortable with. He is wonderful at comfort care and shepherding. He does a terrific job of getting people involved in ministry who may not normally have been involved. When he's spending time with people and building relationships, he comes away feeling fulfilled. And sometimes that makes this "task-oriented, get things chec...

Thirty-one years ago we said, "I do," not knowing what that really meant. We've been through good times, bad times, and in between times.  We are currently going through the valley and some days it's just hard. And it's easy to lash out at each other even though neither one of us is the cause of the valley.  But as we celebrate our 31st wedding anniversary today, I am so thankful for this man that I'm walking through life with. This week has been a particularly trying week and yesterday I was not the nicest woman to live with. But my husband is unendingly patient and forgives me. I married a gem and didn't even realize it at the time.  Unfortunately, today is one of those days where "life" is getting in the way and I'm not even sure we are going to be able to do anything to celebrate it. But I'm thankful for the man I'm married to and am so thankful that God brought us together all those years ago. Happy Anniversary to my roc...

My husband, Dan, definitely has the gift of encouragement. He never has an unkind word to say to anyone, and in our 30 years of marriage I think he's only gotten really angry about 2-3 times. I provoked it big time! He is steady, faithful and a rock. I'm leaving on Friday to go to our old church for a speaking engagement on Saturday. I really wasn't looking forward to the long ride by myself but he volunteered to come along with me so I wouldn't have to drive. It's the type of person he is. He is always looking out for other people's interests. I've seen God open up doors for him and for him to find favor with people in ways that wouldn't happen for others. I spoke yesterday morning at a local nursing home where I run a worship service. Dan has been coming with me because his tutoring schedule has changed. So he plays the cajon (a little drum box) for the singing time and leads them in a time of prayer. I asked him a few weeks ago if he would like...

What happens when you take two people with different ideas of how things should be done, different personalities and leadership methods, and different upbringings and put them together in a marriage? A whole lot of hard work! Add to that the stress of being in ministry and it can mean that there are some tough days. Dan and I have been married for almost 31 years and have walked through some rough paths and yet, I think our marriage is strong. Why is that? Well, we've learned some basic things in our 30 years together. We aren't perfect and there are days when I think, "Wow!" "We blew that today." But overall, I'm thankful for our marriage. Here are some principles we've learned: 1. Don't bash your spouse in public. You shouldn't bash them anywhere, but it makes me cringe when I hear women or men tearing apart their spouse publicly. I've seen Facebook posts where the person is airing their grievances against their partner and ...

On the twelfth day of Christmas my true love gave to me... 💗 Th e gift of getting us home safely last night after having to turn around on our way to take Emily to a friend's for a couple of days. The moment we turned south towards the Thruway it started snowing heavily and then as we got on the thruway, we were almost sideswiped by a tractor trailer who decided to cut across 2 lanes of traffic and started sliding sideways.  Needless to say, we turned around and came back home. It took us 3 hours to go 110 miles.  My husband stayed calm and cool even while I was clutching the dashboard. 💗 The gift of making the coffee every morning. I wake up in the morning, come out of the bedroom and there it is - ready to go. 💗 The gift of making sure we are plowed out and that the cars are cleaned off, sidewalks shoveled, roof raked, etc.  I'm capable of doing it but don't have to because he considers it his job. 💗 The gift of encouragement.  He is an encou...

I picked up the glass from the table for about the millionth time.  Sometimes, it's left on the table and other times on the freezer top which is near the door.  Still other times it's on the coffee table or end table.  It's never left on the counter by the sink, where it belongs. I felt irritation rising in me because really, how difficult is it to just walk a few feet further, and place it where the dirty dishes go?  My husband downs a glass of water or juice each morning and wherever he drinks it, is where the empty glass sits. But just as quickly as that irritation rose up, I thought about the fact that some day there may not be a dirty glass to pick up.  There may not be water splashes to wipe all over the bathroom counter because he is no longer there. And suddenly, those little, silly quirks will be missed.  As I thought about that this morning, the irritation melted away.  The very fact that I have to walk an extra 2 steps to p...

I love you Not only for what you are, But for what I am When I am with you I love you, Not only for what You have made of yourself, But for what you are making of me. I love you For the part of me That you bring out; I love you For putting your hand Into my heaped-up heart And passing over, All the foolish weak things That you can’t help Dimly seeing there And for drawing out Into the light All the beautiful belongings That no one else looked Quite far enough to find. I love you because you Are helping me to make Of the lumber of my life Not a tavern, But a temple; Out of the works Of my every day Not a reproach, But a song. You have done this Without a touch, Without a word, Without a sign. You have done it By being yourself. Perhaps that is what Being a friend means, After all. Twenty-eight years ago today, as young seminary students, we married.  I am so thankful tha...

It's been such a strange Valentine's Day weekend here but one that has been blessed none-the-less.  Dan never was able to go get Stephen for the weekend because of snow.  I've spent the week in pain on the couch and finally headed to the doctor on Friday to discover that I may have a torn meniscus.  So needless to say, I haven't been able to do a lot of standing on my feet which includes grocery shopping.  Dan & I started celebrating Valentine's Day as a family quite a few years ago and it's always been a fun time of having a special meal. However, it really wasn't on my mind because it was hard to move.  The doctor gave me an anti-inflammatory to get through until I can get in to have an MRI, and that has actually helped me to feel better the past two days. Yesterday I was supposed to have a children's art and cooking class but that got cancelled due to a lake effect snow storm which left me with dozens of cookies that I had made for the ...

I've had many roles and titles in my life... Director of Family Literacy Assistant Director of a Preschool Teacher Teacher's Assistant Tutor Administrative Assistant Assistant Director of Women's Ministry Author Business Owner But none are as important to me as the titles of wife and mother.  Being a stay-at-home mom can feel a bit unimportant in this day and age where women are encouraged to make something of themselves, contribute financially and move up the corporate ladder.  And when you are the mother of older kids people often start to act as if there is something wrong with you if you are still at home.  I've heard things such as, "Now that the kids are grown, what are you going to do?"  "Are you going to get a "real" job?"  When my children were little my primary job was to care for them.  I read them stories, rocked them to sleep, wiped runny noses, prepared their meals, and cared for their needs. Because I hom...

  I'm so excited and wanted to share with someone.  My husband is not online at all other than email so I know my secret is safe with you all.   I've pinched pennies for months and taken orders that I didn't really want to do in order to get him a Christmas gift that he is not expecting.  Nathan also helped by chipping in a chunk of money.    It's no secret that my husband loves guitars and is gifted musically.  But money is tight and while he would love a houseful of electric and bass guitars, he has one.  When we moved here he actually sold one of his guitars.  Anyway, his Christmas present is a gift card to a huge guitar center where he can redeem it for a bass guitar and amp he's wanted for a while.    I love being able to do this for him.  He sacrifices so much for us.  He works hard and never asks for anything in return.  He is one of the most selfless people I know so I'm thrilled to gift him w...