New Year; Same Old Me!

 

It's the first day of a new year and with that comes all sort of expectations of change. We set goals and lay out a plan for the year. We have the best of intentions. And that usually lasts for about a week or less, and then we are right back to the same old habits.

Why is that? Because we are still the same person on January 1st that we were on December 31st. We have the same personality, bad attitudes and habits on New Year's Day that we did on New Year's Eve. Good intentions will not help us make change in our life. 

As I sat and thought and prayed about some direction to go this year, I also reflected on the thoughts I'm sharing in this blog post. I'm still the same old Terri with the same tendency towards certain behaviors, thoughts and attitudes. Laying out a bunch of fancy goals will not change anything in my life unless I change at the core of my being.

In my faith journey I have found that will only happen by staying connected to the Lord. For the past few months I've been feeling the need to create some space in my life so I can actually tune out the voices that pull me in a hundred different directions. I'm constantly doing activities because there is this inner voice that tells me that others will be upset if I don't do them. I also tend to find my value and worth in some of those activities. 

It's not a good space to be in because those voices have been such a part of my life that it's hard to discern what God wants me to do. I ask myself, "Am I doing something because I'm following the Lord's leading or is because that dumb inner voice is squawking again?"

My word(s) this year is God alone. I've landed in Psalm 62 and it's a short, but very meaty Psalm. Verse 5 is a key vers and it says, "Rest in God alone, my soul, for my hope comes from Him." The Hebrew word that is used for hope is tikvah which means strong, expectant, waiting, like a cord or rope binding me to God. We cannot slip when we are tethered and fastened securely to the Lord. 

I realize how much I've allowed fear and anxiety to consume me this past year over family stuff and I want to change that. The only way that will happen is to stay tangibly connected and relying on the Lord. 

So while I also did come up with some specific goals for health, ministry, family, etc. my main focus this year is to rely on God alone. Because if I don't allow Him to change me at the core which has to do with trust then nothing in my life will change and none of my fancy goals will come to fruition. 

So in 2026:

• I want to come to God in expectant prayer and trust that He will work and answer and that He will also change me in the process. This means I'm not praying one thing, but inwardly doubting.
• I want to submit to the plan He has for my life and stop fighting against that. I want to stop this constant internal lament or whining wishing things were different (just being real)!
• I want to continue to develop a joyful spirit. I actually had someone pray for me recently and in her prayer she thanked God for my joyfulness that I exuded. That made me happy because I've been working on that, but I want to be able to have that even in the hard times and behind closed doors. 

That's it for this year. My main goal really is to allow God to change me from the inside out. Because without that happening that 2026 will just be a repeat of 2025. 

It's a new year, but the same old me and if nothing changes in me then nothing will change in my life. So I'm pressing forward in expectancy.

Happy New Year!