Wives
I've been working on putting together a devotional on loving our husbands for a ladies luncheon. In trying to find verses related to that, I was struck by an observation. There are a couple of verses that command men on how to be a good husband but there are a multitude of verses that address our role as wives. The Bible seems skewed in our direction. Does that mean that the Bible was written by men in a patriarchal society? I don't think so.
I think that perhaps we have more power as women than we realize. Our obedience to scripture and the way we act towards our husbands is directly related to the way they behave as husbands. For example, so many women complain that their husbands won't lead their families. Yet, they nag and complain and bully them. They are always telling them what to do. If the wife would only be quiet, be respectful, and allow their man the opportunity to lead they might be surprised at his willingness to step up and lead!
That doesn't mean that men don't have responsibility to act the right way but perhaps women have more of tendency to take charge and bulldoze over the top of men! One of the main verses that I can think of as a command to men is "Husbands, love your wives as Christ loved the church." This sums it up nicely. However, have you ever noticed all the verses directed to women about respect, nagging, complaining, and using our mouths to build up rather than tear down? OUCH!!!!
I've been very guilty of this. I constantly need to ask myself, "Am I allowing Dan to lead as the head of this house?" "Do I show him the respect he deserves?" "Do I pay him lip service but my attitude, body language (rolling eyes), and resistance show him differently?" I have so much work to do in this area and it's something I struggle with every day.
However, I truly want to be the kind of wife that the begining of Proverbs 12:4 mentions, "A virtuous and worthy wife [earnest and strong in character] is a crowning joy to her husband, but she who makes him ashamed is as rottenness in his bones." [Amplified Version]
How about you?
I think that perhaps we have more power as women than we realize. Our obedience to scripture and the way we act towards our husbands is directly related to the way they behave as husbands. For example, so many women complain that their husbands won't lead their families. Yet, they nag and complain and bully them. They are always telling them what to do. If the wife would only be quiet, be respectful, and allow their man the opportunity to lead they might be surprised at his willingness to step up and lead!
That doesn't mean that men don't have responsibility to act the right way but perhaps women have more of tendency to take charge and bulldoze over the top of men! One of the main verses that I can think of as a command to men is "Husbands, love your wives as Christ loved the church." This sums it up nicely. However, have you ever noticed all the verses directed to women about respect, nagging, complaining, and using our mouths to build up rather than tear down? OUCH!!!!
I've been very guilty of this. I constantly need to ask myself, "Am I allowing Dan to lead as the head of this house?" "Do I show him the respect he deserves?" "Do I pay him lip service but my attitude, body language (rolling eyes), and resistance show him differently?" I have so much work to do in this area and it's something I struggle with every day.
However, I truly want to be the kind of wife that the begining of Proverbs 12:4 mentions, "A virtuous and worthy wife [earnest and strong in character] is a crowning joy to her husband, but she who makes him ashamed is as rottenness in his bones." [Amplified Version]
How about you?
I find myself being the controller and I have to back down. I think it's because I'm so used to doing the mom thing during the day that it's easy to continue even after hubby gets home.
ReplyDeleteI have to remind myself to let him lead. Step in behind him and support him, not control him. Keep a positive outlook and speak in love.
I am reading 'Beautiful in God's eyes', a study of the Proverbs 31 woman. It's a challenge.
ReplyDeleteHi Terri,
ReplyDeleteThis is good. I have to step back at times too. I am a leader by nature and Dave is a follower. So this is an real issue for us at times.
Hugs,
Elizabeth
I like that Proverb, not sure the verse no, that says something like: "Better to live on a corner of the roof than in the house with a quarrelsome woman". and "A quarrelsome wife is like a constant dripping." I think I am remembering these right... LOL Anyway, thanks for the reminders Terri! Maybe you can share with us what you teach at the luncheon.
ReplyDeleteHi Terri ~
ReplyDeleteI wish I could come and hear all you have to share ~ excellent words to think about. I know I have alot of work in this area too!
Blessings,
Sharon
oh, Terri, if you only knew how much i needed this.
ReplyDeletemy struggle is that my husband has no personal relationship with Jesus. Church and Bible are not a priority to him.
Last night at Bible study the pastor brought up 1 John 3:16...
"by this we know love, because He laid down His life for us. And we also ought to lay down our lives for the brethren." He related this to marriage... we daily have to lay down our lives for our spouses.
and now I come to read your recent post and God is speaking to me through your words.
It's amazing how He knows exactly what we need to hear and when we need to hear it!
Thank you, dear friend.
A great reminder Terri. I think it's often hard for us to switch over from Mother to Wife...we spend our day organizing everyone and telling others what to do...we need to remember that our husband is not an extra child!
ReplyDeleteGreat post, x