Monday, July 15, 2013

Engaged

"I don't want to go to the parade."  "I have way too much to do."

"You are missing the point."  "It's not about making activity."  "It's about living in the moment and enjoying what you have in front of you."

Words spoken last week by my very wise husband to his very frantic-paced wife.

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If I can't slow down enough to realize the point of what I'm doing, then there is no point.  I'm just making noise.  I can be so wrapped up in making memories that I don't enjoy the moments I have.  I live my life rushing from one event to the next, planning, organizing, doing.  

The problem with that is that I miss those glimmering moments.  I can be too impatient and focused on doing that I miss out on these little blips in my life.

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My daughter's desire to tell me every detail about the book she reading. My son's wish to just sit and talk with us about what he is learning.  My other son's joy in chatting about his life.

I can view these things as annoying interruptions in my busy life.  But they are the point of my life.

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Those moments are why I say I do what I do.  They should be viewed as bits of blessing, not annoyances or interruptions or exasperating conversations.

I had a moment of clarity this morning.  The house is quiet.  Too quiet.  My daughter is away at a sleepover.  Nathan is sleeping.  Dan & Stephen are at work.  I have a glimpse of what it will be like when it's just me and Dan.  When there are no interruptions.  When the house is silent.

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It is strange.  It is empty feeling.  It makes me realize that one day, I may long for those conversations and dirty laundry and big meals.  I may miss the interruptions.

So I want to live in the moment.  To appreciate the noise.  The interruptions.  The life before me.  

Making memories is a good thing as long as you are fully engaged in the memory-making process.  I want to live in the moment enough to have enjoyed the precious memories with my family.  I don't want to just be a spectator in my life.

I want to be engaged.