Friday, November 8, 2013

An Unimportant Job?

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I have struggled for years with trying to find my self-worth through things that the world thinks is important.  Even though I would never admit it, I felt that in order to be valued I had to have some sort of position.  I had to have a job that society viewed as worthy.  

When people would ask me what I do, I would always qualify my answer of a stay at home mom with something I felt would elevate that in their eyes.  The qualifiers were things like....

► I tutor kids with learning disabilities.

► I used to be the director of a family literacy center.

► I'm home because of xyz.

► I'm home because as a pastor's wife I'm busy with the church.

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I never would just say, "I'm a homemaker." or "I'm a stay at home mom."  It had to have a disclaimer after it. And yet, maybe I've gained some wisdom over the years because I'd say in the past year or two, it just doesn't matter to me anymore.  I see the value in what I do.  I don't really care if someone thinks I must be lazy or I don't have any ambition.

My "job" is valuable because I'm called to do it.  I am providing help to my husband.  I'm available to my children.  I am able to hold things down at home with my husband's very busy schedule.

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But more importantly, my job is valuable because the Lord sees ME as valuable.  He sees the desire of my heart.  He knows my motives.  He knows my desire is to serve Him.  To raise children who can function well in society.  To raise children who love Him and will then in turn, go out into the world and do what God is calling them to do, whatever that may be.

I've spent so many years chasing after things because I was worried with what people thought about me.  I want to spend the rest of my life resting in the role I have and have always wanted.

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When I look back over my life, the people I remember the most are those women who were a strong central figure in their home.  Who taught me little things through example - how to prepare a meal, how to care for their children, how to garden, and how to do a myriad of things to care for their families.  Those are things I've always been drawn to and tried to emulate.

Some examples I had were:

♥ My pastor's wife who was very content in her role as a wife and mother.

♥ Our landlady from Yugoslavia who would taught me about gardening.

♥ A friend from Germany who kept her house so spotless you could eat off her floors!

♥ Another friend who honors her husband with her words and her life.  I've never heard a bad word out of her mouth about him.

♥ A friend who is a terrific mom and has adult children who are successful and so close to her.

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So, I'm very thankful that the Lord has brought me to this place in my life.  I'm thankful that I'm learning to stop apologizing for the fact that I don't work outside the home.  I'm thankful that God is helping me do things to bring in some income while I care for my husband and children.

So I can say today that I'm blessed because I am a homemaker.