Lap Problems

There are so many times when I wish my children were little again so I could protect them from the big, scary world out there.  I remember fussing about something Nathan was doing when he was around two years old and an older women in my church told me, "Honey, these are called lap problems."  "You pull them onto your lap and the problem is solved!"

She was so right. Now that I have adult children it's so much harder because their problems are bigger and I can't control anything. I can't make them do what I want. I can't make them choose what I think is best for them. I can't do anything. Except pray. And ask God to speak to their hearts.  

I am finding that having adult children is increasing my prayer life. I really have great kids and they generally make pretty smart choices. But I get anxious for their future. As my daughter begins to date, I want her to make the best decision of who to choose. As Stephen looks for work, I want him to be diligent about it and I'm concerned as to how that will all pan out. I get fearful at times for Nathan's future when we are no longer around. How will he manage with his disabilities?

And yet, I know fear is really just a desire to control. I want to control their environment. I want to control the things that happen to them. I want to control them. OUCH!

I'm just being truthful here. I don't like NOT being in control. And yet, if I truly understand how much God loves me and my children, I wouldn't have the need to control our circumstances. I could open up my tightly clenched fingers and allow God to work in my children's life. If I really understand the very nature of God, I can release my kids into His hands and breathe a sigh of relief.

I find that each new stage of life, brings a renewed awareness of God's presence and new areas of my life that need working on.  I'm so thankful for His grace and His mercy that is breathed out on me a daily basis. 

These problems are bigger than "lap problems" and I daily need to climb into my Heavenly Father's lap and pour out my heart to Him. He can solve these problems, but I need to be willing to leave them on His lap. 

It's hard being a parent and yet, it is one of the things that keeps us running to the Lord each day.