The Summer of Being Still

After tossing and turning a bit, I gave up trying to get back to sleep and got out of bed at 5 a.m. I sat on my back deck and had my coffee and quiet time and decided that I'd like to try a stroll around my yard. 

I actually made it to the back field, taking pictures along the way, before common sense kicked in. The thought occurred to me, "Nobody is up and if I fall and hurt myself I'm going to be laying here for a very long time!" lol

But I'm happy to report that the swelling in my knee has gone down and I can bend it further. It's not back to normal by any means and I have to really think about bending it and do it very slowly or else I let out a yelp of pain, but I'm on the mend. I have my post-op appointment this morning and we shall see what the doctor says, but I've been working hard at the exercises the past 4 days.

During my fidgeting in bed this morning I was thinking about how much time I've wasted the past few months, plunked in a chair with my leg up. I was going over all these plans of things I'd like to do in my head when I felt God saying, "Can you just be still?" "Can you not jump into another 'busy' activity this summer and just take this time to sit and learn from me?" "Stop immediately racing to the next 'thing'!"

Maybe my only goal this summer should be to work on consecration papers, sit and listen to the Lord, and realize that it is okay to do that. Perhaps prayer should be the only activity I concentrate on for the next 6-7 weeks. I have spent the past 25+ years of ministry going at a crazy pace. It could be that I need to just say, "Enough!" And just because I have a high productivity pace, does that necessarily mean I need to do that? Just because I can do something, it doesn't mean I should do it.

My spirit longs to be still, but I know my tendency to jump into activity. I know that I often feel like I'm being lazy if I'm not always on the move. But I want to be obedient to that prompting of the Holy Spirit so I'm fighting down many of those urges I have. I am working at ignoring the feeling that I'm letting other's down, or not living up to their expectations or my own expectations.

So my summer of being still is continuing. This time it's a self-inflicted stillness as I try to hear from God and know more of Him. 

Psalm 46:10 (NIV) ~

He says, “Be still, and know that I am God;
    I will be exalted among the nations,
    I will be exalted in the earth.”