Owning their own Faith


Yesterday, my eldest child turned 28 years old. At the end of the month my youngest will be turning 20. When did that happen? It seems like I blinked and children have become adults. 

As they have entered into their 20s there have been some bumpy spots as I've had to learn how to relate to adult children in a whole new way. Ordering them around, especially the boys, just doesn't get the same results as it used to when they were young. ;-)

After dinner the other night, Stephen and Dan were talking about faith and teens and discussing how many young adults were turning their back on their faith. Stephen made the observation that some of it has to do with the way parents relate to their middle school and high school aged kids He said that when teens start questioning their faith, many parents have a tendency to give them trite Sunday school answers and shut them down immediately. Some parents relate to their teenagers like they did when they were little.

It was nice to hear him say that he thought we did a good job raising him and his siblings because we talked to them like adults at an early age. We let them raise questions, and we wrestled with some big topics. We listened to them and allowed them to express their opinions about different issues.

Do I always agree with my kid's conclusions about God and faith? No. But I'd rather have them wrestle with these things and allow God to work in their lives than just give them pat answers. Because if I never allowed them to question things I believe it would be much easier to be led astray.

I see so many adult Christians who blindly follow leaders without checking things against scripture or thinking things through to their logical conclusion. These same adults share meme after meme on Facebook that cause me cringe when I read the faulty logic. So yes, I want my children to learn to reason something out. I want them to develop a strong faith which will only happen if I allow God to work in their lives as they wrestle through things.

I spend a lot of time praying for my adult children, but I also trust that I raised them well. They are going to make many decisions in their lives. Some I'll agree with and some I won't but I want them to be able to think things through and embrace their own faith. Because when they own it, that will be a lasting faith.

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