Hearts in Service

I realize that my past few posts may seem like I'm sitting here in my house wallowing in self-pity. The reality is that while I do have moments of sorrow, most of the time I get back up, dust myself off and move forward. My sense of humor remains intact so I can find humor in most things going on in my life. I told someone the other day that one of the side effects of my covid-related lack of taste and smell is NOT losing weight. I said that I just keep eating, hoping the next bite will be the one where my taste comes back! So far that's not working. 😉 My biggest dilemma in life is figuring out what I should do and what I shouldn't do with my time. I have so many good opportunities that come my way and quite often I leap before I look. I'm learning to slow it down, pray about things and figure out what fits into the bigger plan that God has for my life. So rather than just say, "Yes!" to opportunities, I need to figure out what is the best yes I can give.  So...

Click. Last Monday night as I was walking up the steps from our family room I felt something give in my knee. Instantly I was transported back to a time when pain, knee braces, hobbling around and crutches were my norm. It seems as if I've re-torn my meniscus and after a visit to the doctor, who wasn't very helpful with a solution, certain things in my life have come to a halt.  There are no more markets for the rest of the season. No more walks through the woods. There is not much of anything except sitting. I have moments when it doesn't hurt so much and I can almost walk normally and will get a few things done. However, after a few minutes of this, it flares back up, and I'm in my recliner with an ice pack on my knee. It feels like insult has been added to injury. The season I'm in has really taken on a nightmarish quality in many ways. I miss taste and smell. I miss walking and breathing in the fresh scents as I walk through an open meadow. I miss my mother. I m...

  Summer is coming to an end and even though it's been a very hot and humid week, you can tell that autumn will be here before we know it. The leaves are starting to get hints of brown and yellow. It's getting dark a bit earlier and the sun is rising later in the morning. Even though it wasn't the summer I planned for, I am still thankful for many things.  💗 Good days at the market when I could get there.  💗 Backyard visitors every day. They are foraging for seeds and bugs and keep me entertained. Juncos are funny little birds.  💗 We had an outreach event a couple of weeks ago and I'm thankful that I'm still hearing good things about it from our church people and the community. One of our visitors came back to a church service as a result of the event. 💗 God continues to bless me even when I don't deserve it. I find that I can spiral very quickly into whining and yet, because He is a good father, He continues to give me good things. 💗 I had an opportunity t...

This road has been a familiar sight lately as we travel back and forth to check in on my father-in-law and take him to visit my mother-in-law who is in a rehabilitation center for her fractured pelvis. We have all been taking a couple of days to do this each week. My mother-in-law is slated to come home on Wednesday. It's been a rough time for her as she is in pain, depressed and anxious and wanting to be home. This week has been a rough one for me as well as the anxiety and depression in my own life has flared up. There are stressors going on that have caused some of it. Others are health issues - I think I reinjured my knee somehow, 6 months after getting Covid, I still can't taste or smell, and I'm dealing with carpal tunnel problems in my wrist.  And I know I'm not the only one. So many people are dealing with far worse than these issues. So what is one to do as a Christ-follower when there is so much hardship in this world? The prophet Habakkuk was facing calamity ...

One of the things that I find interesting about my walk with the Lord is that when I allow Him to work in me, He never allows me to stay stagnant. I add the caveat "when I allow Him to..." because unfortunately, many never allow themselves to stretch and grow. It's easy to be so comfortable in the way things have been that growth never happens. Yesterday, we had an outreach event at our church. It ended up being a very successful time as we watched different people in our church have the freedom to use their gifts in ministry. We saw lots of new people attend. And it helped to build relationship bonds as we all worked together.  However, the weirdest thing for me was that I had no role to play in the organizing of the event. In every single church we've been a part of, I've always initiated and led these type of outreach events. The only role I had in this particular one was bringing a dish to share and running the kid's craft booth. It was so different for me...

We've all been at the end of them. We've all pointed them. "Why can't the pastor be more like Pastor John?" "Can you believe she wore that to church?"  "Did you hear what he did last night?"  "Do you know what she said?" "Did you hear that Jeff is mad at Tom?" "I don't like to gossip...but..." We whisper these things and then we wonder why people avoid Christians. Why people can't see Jesus when we are supposed to represent him? Why the church is filled with the walking wounded? There have been times when I've been guilty at times of pointing my finger. Of judging someone based on their exterior instead of looking at their heart. I've been guilty of the whispers and the stares. "Lord, forgive me.  Help me to get out of the way so people can see around me to you." I've felt the staring eyes boring deep into my soul. The pointed fingers. The heat in my cheeks. The whispers behind my back...

The corn is getting high in the field, the sun is setting at a different angle, the days have grown a bit shorter. We are finishing the first week of August and before I know it, autumn will be here in the Northeast. Summer is a very short season. I don't feel like I really had a summer this year. Our vacation was spent doing just a few hikes because it rained the whole time. I've been busy with the market. And now I'm busy in a caretaking role so we won't be taking any more vacation days this summer. But there have been small moments here or there that I have enjoyed. I'm trying to make a conscious effort to stop and sit a while and enjoy my back patio. To take in the sunrise or the sunset. To appreciate the small things. The other morning as I sat and read, I heard a rustling and looked up to see a little junco sitting on one of my patio chairs and watching me. It was joined by a friend and they were entertaining for about 20 minutes as they flittered back and for...

"Mom fell and fractured her pelvis."  This is the phone call I received from my sister-in-law last Tuesday. One minute I was happily doing some work at the church and mentally preparing what I was going to do to get ready for the market on Thursday. I was going to get started on some coursework for classes I'm taking in the fall. The next moment, I was racing home so Dan could head out to the hospital to be with his sister and dad. After hours of waiting and fighting an internal battle against selfishness, I decided that since I don't have a full-time job, I could go and care for her when she came home from the hospital. I spent the week at my in-law's house, care-taking, cleaning and cooking. My sister-in-law came and relieved me on Friday and I'm headed back for the week today. It's hard when these things happen. It's hard for the person they happen to, and difficult for those around them who feel the effects of the circumstances. And yet, we have no...